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On this week’s show:

We get mail — and some of it is ready to explode in your face . . . Or other places.

As Susie Sexpert, I hope I am famous for scoffing at any and all products that promise to enlarge vaginas and tighten penises. —Or, is it the other way around?

In any case, I’ve tried some of the mojo-in-a-bottle. The companies that make these rackets— I mean, products— ship me endless samples, and sometimes you just have to have a laugh. Laugh, and attack their very premise.

I am here on the mic, with my cuntwise report! I expect Consumer Reports to be AT MY DOOR. Actually, I know an editor at CR who would love this… gotta remember to send it to him.

‘Til next week,

Clits Up!

Susie


Are you ready to enlarge your horizons, print out the map to your G-spot, and eradicate frauds and buffoons forever?

I thought so. Subscribe and keep Susie on the mic!

Adult Intellectuals Only


Today’s true story of consumer chemical survival includes an excerpt from my old podcast, In Bed with Susie Bright, Episode 289. Enjoy the whole show at the Aud link — and thank you to my producers Jessica Lockhart and Kerry Donahue.

Comments, anyone? I’d love to hear the dumbest retail item you ever tried in the bed or the kitchen, you choose. Or, the best! But the stupid ones are funnier, eh?


Susie Bright’s Journal
Back to Bed with Susie Bright
"Susie Bright is a national treasure, right up there with the Grand Canyon, the battlefield at Gettysburg, the Okefeenokee Swamp, and the Smithsonian Nancy Reagan Memorial Dress Collection."
• Whole Earth Review