The Occasional Sex Question

Not One Drop of Sex Since the Pandemic?

“March” by Joyce Ballantyne

I got a letter the other day from a reader who appreciated my historic relationship sex advice.

I thought I'd answer it here, as I imagine many can relate:

Hi Susie,

My partner Sela and I have been together for two years. It’s been a rough road, but we are emotionally connected and love each other very much.

However, we haven’t had sex or physical intimacy since July of 2020.

She has been through a lot of trauma during that time. Death of loved one, business stress, loss of beloved dog. Her mother became estranged from her, in part, at least, because of our marriage. COVID.

Sela says she’s attracted to me but has no libido.

Is this bed-death? Or "normal?"

We are also both sober. It’s the first sober relationship for both of us. I’m two years in and want it to work.

I just feel frustrated and a bit insecure.

B.